Single Moms Raising Autistic Sons


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Saturday, January 28, 2012

I am so ANGRY and frustrated with the Intensive Home Care team, I have caught them in lies and their collaboration with the staff has done Griffin nothing but harm. I had to call the school counselor to get the truth about the bullying, he told me that the kids were in fact laughing at Griffin when he got angry and that is exactly what Griffin kept reporting but nobody would listen to him.

I also found out through calling the autism specialist that things were fine with Griffin in class and he loved school until the teacher started making higher demands on him and then Griffin only showed frustration and anger. Interesting how the Intensive Home Care team never mentioned calling either of those experts in order to help Griffin out with his issues, just goes to show how the mother has to be her child's best advocate because if I relied on anyone else they wouldn't have his best interest in mind like I do.

I also had to call Griffin's pediatrician and asked him to communicate with Griffin's pediatric neurologist because Griffin had developed complex tics on top of the simple tics that he has already had and they were getting worse. Kudos to the staff and doctors for being on top of the matter in a day's time they truly care for Griffin and had his best interest and health in mind. However, when I called IHC team I wasn't allowed to talk to the doctor (psychiatrist) who needed to change his medications, or her assistant. One of the team members spoke to me and told me that the doctor said to only give Griffin half of the dose that he had been taking for his whole life and I quickly and adamantly protested because I knew that it wouldn't work. She mentioned that the doctor had to think of liability and I replied that apparently that is all that she had in mind because he had been on the .2 dose of Clonidine since he was 3 years old in Anchorage, Alaska. Every doctor that we have seen since then has agreed that that dosage was correct for him.

I was determined to do what was best for Griffin and found that there was one refill and so I called it in to the pharmacy right away. The team member said that I was going against the doctor's orders but I reminded her that she doesn't know Griffin because she has only seen him twice for about 20 minutes each time so how could she know better than his pediatrician and his neurologist?

All they have done is to make Griffin more insecure and caused him to think that it is okay to not be heard, to not be listened to by his teachers and those who are serving as role models. They have not listened to him when he kept crying out for help where the bullying was concerned and made it seem like it was all in his head. I cannot wait to have these people out of our home and to be able to have our privacy back and to stop being judged and talked about all the time behind my back. It is demeaning and they treat us both like we are idiots and I do nothing right and that all they do is perfect.

I must add that Griffin loves James but I do feel that after the first visit he had been fed judgment about us and started acting strangely the second visit. I do appreciate that he plays with Griffin instead of just focusing on his academics like the girls do. He does have really good ideas.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Griffin is doing so well and showing so much progress with the Intensive Home work, there is a new worker who is a male and Griffin absolutely adores him. James played with Griffin outside playing the drums in the parking lot and then throwing the football which Griffin really enjoyed. When it was time for James to leave Griffin started crying and James took the time and had great patience with him to help him transition to the separation until next Monday.

I really appreciate that James took so much time with him helping Griffin to learn new coping skills for stress and anxiety for tantrums/meltdowns and helping him to take his time on his homework. Griffin has only a couple of male figures in his life but they are at school which is not necessarily good because he doesn't really like school. Griffin's IEP is coming up in February and I know exactly what I am going to say and demand for Griffin that has not been taken into consideration the whole year. I will report back and let you know what that is closer to that time because there are individuals from the school who read this from time to time. I don't want them to know ahead of time because I am getting advocates to come to help support me since I know how overwhelming it can be in an IEP with all those staff talking so fast and moving from topic to topic and getting the mom to sign here and there without really explaining what's going on.

The last IEP was a disaster for me because I didn't have anyone to help interpret what was being said and things moved so fast and then it was over and I had no idea what had just happened now Griffin has been in a class for a year that pressures him to keep up with his peers which has caused him to get two- F's in reading and low grades in others areas as well. His (mainstream) teacher complained that he has to take so much time with Griffin and do so much extra work to help him that it is not fair to the rest of the class. Well, then why is he in that class? Why is he not in a special needs class? If he needs extra help then isn't it fair to him that he gets that one on one without interfering with the needs of the rest of the class?

All the time I brag about how intelligent Griffin is and that he is but it does take him awhile to process and then he does have special needs in the area of sensory motor skills and still has communication skills difficulties and of course social skills. In fact, he has been having a marked issues with bullies and it has caused anxiety. He talks about it almost everyday and it is always on his mind, his teacher and special needs teacher I don't think are taking it seriously because they say that it is just Griffin's misinterpretation of what the other kids are doing. That may be part of it but that still needs to be addressed and he needs to learn skills to cope with that. He is suffering and I think that if he were in a special needs classroom then he would be where other kids experience the same things and the teacher would have more sensitivity to his needs.

I hope to be posting more often now so please check by often and I will spend more time visiting your blogs because I miss knowing what you all are doing, I do consider you to be my special blogger friends.