Growing Up

Griffin came home the other day with a photo of a little girl that he had taken out of his back pack. I asked him who that was and he said it was Amanda a little girl who rides his bus, a friend of his and I thought that it was so darn cute! Griffin has a little girlfriend and I am not even sure that he even knows that he does but that's okay anyhow. My little guy is getting so big I can't believe it.

I have been going to the gym regularly and started free weights last week, I am so excited to become lean and ripped! Stopped being severely manic because of 1000 mg. of Depakene and now am just hypomanic but I am just getting 4 hours of sleep a night but when one is hypomanic one is able to function with such little amounts of sleep because of having so much extra energy. Don't know if my doc will prescribe more sleep meds since yet another has failed me or if he will let me function on 4 hours which I doubt.

Griffin wants to go fishing so badly but I don't know what to do, how to go about setting up everything. Our neighbor knows how to I think but I want it to be something that Griffin and I do alone. Maybe I will invite our neighbor to go the first trip to teach me how and then tell her that I want to do it alone with Griffin after that but then I will feel bad because Nikki wants to go fishing all the time and talks about how she wishes that she could go. I guess that she could come along sometimes and Griffin and I could do it alone sometimes that seems like the happy medium.

Rest & Relaxation

Griffin and I have been just taking it easy the past couple of days, since there's no school for me things have been so much better. Griffin had only a half day on Friday and yesterday we went to feed the ducks and to the park to play on the playground. He actually wanted to stay and socialize with the kids at the lake when feeding the ducks, talking to them about the kinds of ducks and geese, he observed a little boy and his father fishing asking them questions, and talked to a family about their dog. Oh yea and he meandered up to a picnic table peeking at their food, I guess that he was hungry and curious, and they offered him some cookies asking me first if it was okay. Once we were at the playground Griffin played mostly by himself as I had Abby with me, it was too hot to leave her in the car so we walked her and brought her along.

Today we went to Unity Center, we were late but we made it and Griffin was patient for the most part sitting through the service with me. He got thirsty and needed a cookie which they happened to have nearby. We don't really have any other plans but it is gorgeous outside so we will be spending some time out there today on the playground playing with the neighborhood kids and walking Abby.

Time for Change

I am officially quitting school and it is a big relief for me because all the stress of it was causing me to become overwhelmed and made my Fibtomyalgia flare up really bad, which is a sure sign that something is wrong. I know that I made the right decision because I feel 95% better today after having just made the decision yesterday. That's how the mind and body work. That is how stress works and I am not letting it effect me like that any longer!

It was just too much for me to try to manage a household, to give Griffin the attention he needs and deserves, to keep this place clean, to get to all the doctors appointments and therapy sessions, and to get my school work done and I know that people do it all the time even as single parents but that's okay but I just have a harder time than most people.

Now I will have more time to write in the blog again and to read all my friend's blogs YIPEE!

He Couldn't Hurt a Flea!

How can anyone think that my child would ever hurt me? I mean like really hurt me as in harm me. That is what my neighbor thinks and says that she worries about me as Griffin gets older. She says that Griffin bullies me sometimes which maybe is what she is seeing is when he is having a meltdown and I know that IF he lashes out then I need to get it under control but he hasn't done that in a long time and she has never seen him do it either.

What she witnessed the other day was at the craft store when he had a meltdown and all he was doing was crying at first and then he hugged her kind of hard but he was attempting calm himself and apparently she was seeing him as being aggressive. He was upset initially because he said that I pushed him and I told him that I was sorry that I didn't remember pushing him that I didn't mean to but he kept saying that I pushed him but before the chaos started he had wanted some candy by the register and I told him no that it wasn't okay and that was when he lost it and told me that I had pushed him. So was he upset over the candy or the pushing? Was he having the meltdown because of how I handled the situation and because I said no or was it because he had felt that his space had been violated by me and he just couldn't handle that (not typical but possible)?

I would like to take this time to thank my dear friend Amy who has taken the time to help me and I just got off the phone with her and didn't even tell her how wonderful she is and how much she means to me...what a friend I am! I LOVE YOU Girl!!!

Griffin Wasn't Feeling Well

This is kind of old news now but I was so busy tending to him and letting him use the computer while he was at home that I didn't get around to posting about it on the blog. But Griffin had to have an ultrasound two days ago and lab work done yesterday to see what was going on with this pain that he has been having in his abdomen.

It started out about a month ago as heartburn and I let it go about a week because I thought that he may have been just making it up trying to get out of school and homework but when I realized that he was not kidding then I took him to the doctor who prescribed Prevacid to be taken twice a day which helped his stomach pain but not the pain that he had in the lower part of his abdomen.

I took him again to the same clinic and a different doctor saw him and said that the pain seemed to be over his gall bladder and appendix so he ordered the ultrasound which turned out to be normal and lab work which we will know about tomorrow.

I have kept him out of school because he has been so very lethargic not wanting to do even his favorite activities and seemed to be in a lot of pain but tonight he was quite energetic, running around feeling great and since I am writing this at midnight I think that it is safe to say that I will be sending him to school tomorrow. I might wait until I get the lab results just to be sure and to give him some fun time out of school to go fly his kite but he will be going back tomorrow!

An Important Letter to the Teacher

I need you, Anonymous, to help me out on this one! I do wish that I knew who you are because you are so wonderful, so kind, and so caring to us, but for now I will just settle for some helpful advice. You were right that I should have gone to observe Griffin in the classroom before signing the IEP because I just found out from Griffin that he does sometimes have meltdowns at school which means that they lied to me. The told me that he doesn't have them at school at all and I, being so trusting and wanting to believe them I suppose, believed them and signed the IEP.

Now I haven't sent the e-mail to the teacher being pissed off that I am but trying to maintain some semblance of professionalism even though I would love to let loose on her and give her a piece of my mind! Here is the e-mail that I have composed after she wrote to me and told me that I could observe Griffin for ONLY 30 minutes in the classroom during reading time:
 
Hi Mrs.   W.

This date will work for me but 30 minutes will not suffice. I would like to observe him for at least an hour in the classroom setting and it doesn't matter what he is doing. 

I need to observe his behavior in the classroom because Griffin has informed me that he does in fact have meltdowns in school sometimes which means that you have lied to me which means that I am very unhappy right now that I signed that IEP! I feel that I was tricked into signing it, that I was rushed through the meeting since I didn't have an advocate and now I will get a lawyer and have someone on my side to advocate for Griffin.

So, (Anon.) and everyone else I need to know how to change this letter because I haven't sent it yet and what should I add to it? I sure hope that you are reading this post soon so that I can send this letter to her soon. I want to get the point across but be cool about it at the same time especially since these letters may be used by lawyers later on if it ever gets to that point heaven forbid!