Single Moms Raising Autistic Sons

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Tuesday, December 02, 2014

Griffin: My Wish for You

I wish for you, my love, to experience every emotion possible and to never allow anyone to tell you that your feelings are wrong or that you shouldn't feel or express them. It is only natural to experience all that God gave us in our hearts and to never be ashamed of who you are, how you behave, and how you express yourself. It is natural to feel good and bad and to not stifle any of them because if you do then that is when you have a life long problem of resisting and what you resist persists. Anger, hate, fear, embarrassment, jealousy, resentment, frustration, are all part of what makes you human and if you just feel it and let it pass then it will not persist and haunt you keeping you awake at night gnawing at your stomach making you sick.

Relish in all the good emotions and focus on them when you have them making them last as long as you can. But don't expect them to last forever because not every day is a happy one and we should cherish all that God has blessed us with which is a spectrum of emotions sometimes all within one day. This is perfectly natural. It has taken me 50 years to realize all this and I didn't learn it by just existing. I learned through reading and reading by taking an interest in being a better person so that I could be a better mom to you.

We have both grown and progressed a great deal during this past year. I have eliminated negative influences from my life and I am taking control of my environment by limiting my exposure to those who I have to have contact with but can be depressing and not supportive. I want you to feel empowered to feel in control of your life so that no one can ever take advantage of you and make you feel less than human. Griffin, you are a gift to the world especially to me and anyone who doesn't appreciate you for who you are is not deserving of your presence. I have gratitude and quintessential joy for having you in my life and the more I learn about you each day only brings me closer to you strengthening our bond that no one could ever break.

You have taught me more than I have taught you and I will let you know how much I love you by showing you through my assertive actions on your behalf until the day I pass from this earth. I will be your advocate as long as you need me and respect you as an individual with dignity and honor. Recognizing your talents , skills, and intelligence and at the same time appreciating that you have deficits and that you require help and support, understanding, and compassion. I will stop at nothing to stand up for you so that you can live a happy, natural, fulfilling, content way of life. Living life to the fullest! I love you buggly!


Anonymous said...

this is such a beautiful letter to griffin. because of you he is on his way to knowing all of this. it is so easy to see the love in griffin s heart both of you have each other for a reason understand, respect, and it shows. love mom.

DAwn Marcotte said...

Wonderful post. Thank you for sharing it. Griffin is a very lucky boy.