Being a Single Stay at Home Mom

I started this blog out with the premise of just writing about Griffin and not about myself but I feel that it is time to give a little insight on what it's like to be me: a single stay at home mom. Let it be clear that I am not here to complain or to point a finger at anyone for the situation that I am in. I made choices that put me where I am today and I am grateful for all that I have which is an awesome and precious child and all the rest is just a minor inconvenience. Griffin and I live off of public assistance and his SSI check because I am not able to work full time due to Griffin not being able to go to regular daycare. Griffin goes to school 6 hours a day but his child psychiatrist recommended that he not go to daycare besides the school time stating that it would be detrimental to his progress and well being.

We do not receive child support because Griffin's father disappeared when I told him that I was pregnant so we don't know where he is presently. However, I will never speak of him in a negative way because if it wasn't for him I wouldn't have my beautiful child and besides it would be disrespectful to Griffin to demean his father. Some people may beg to differ on this subject but once again it was a choice that I made that I take full responsibility for and blame no one else. It would be nice for Griffin's father to be in his life and to help us out financially but since that's not the case I just get by the best I can and know that one day I will be in better shape financially. Besides, we aren't hurting for anything our medical is paid for and that is most important because it provides Griffin with all the therapy that he needs.

Life as a single mom is tough there's no doubt about that and especially since I have no family here in Alaska and little support otherwise. I don't have any friends who can watch Griffin for me on a regular basis so that I can have a much needed break but so what, it is just a fact of my life and something that I have just become accustomed to. It can be really hard and quite frustrating when Griffin is having his tantrums and there's no way to escape the screaming and crying so I have just learned to have a weird sense of humor about it and find ways to laugh when I really want to cry.

I have to give credit is due, I have a loving and understanding family who fully support me with their heart and soul which means the world to me. The only thing is that they all live in N.C. and S.C. but fortunately they have free long distance and we talk a lot over the phone. Griffin also has an awesome group of people teaching him at school and their hard work and dedication is made apparent by his excellent progress. This is great support for me as well since they take care of him for 6 hours each day which gives me a break to do some things that I enjoy. I do work part time while Griffin is in school but right now it is sporadic at best and I need more education before I am able to work more regularly.

I am a very proactive mom who does a great deal of research on autism and I am the number one advocate for my child. Eventually I would like to volunteer to be an advocate for early intervention and autism. One major thing that I forgot to mention is that I have Bipolar Disorder, ADHD, and Auditory Processing Disorder. I am being tested in January for autism because I believe that I have Asperger's. These things do no define me but are a huge part of my life and they do interfere with my ability to process information therefore I do have difficulty with verbal communication and with completing tasks. I am presently on excellent medications for my bipolar disorder and they help to keep my moods stable thus I handle situations much easier.

All and all I have a good life regardless of the minor inconveniences. I have the most incredible child that I ever could have imagined and that is all I need to make me smile and just let the rest of life take it course. I am eternally grateful for all life's treasures , I welcome the challenges that I face with each passing day and have learned to love living in the world of autism.