Single Moms Raising Autistic Sons


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Monday, September 04, 2006

We Are Moving

I have thought about it long and hard and finally come to the conclusion that we are in fact going to move to South Carolina to be with my family. It was not an easy decision to make because Griffin is getting some of the best education that he could possibly have in the nation here. Kathleen has been such an awesome teacher and I just know that wherever we go that nothing will compare to what she has done for him. I could be wrong, and I hope that I am, but it's just a feeling that I have. Nevertheless, what's most important at this point in time is that we are close to our family and have the support that is so desperately needed. I don't want a repeat of last December when I had to go to the Crisis Treatment Center because my depression had gotten so bad. My mental health is tantamount to his education because I have to take care of myself before I can be a good mother to Griffin. As much as I love Alaska, and it will be a sad day indeed, I must leave here because the weather and the lack of sunlight in the winter just gets me down too bad. Not that it is going to be all peachy keen to move to SC because it's not my ideal climate either. The summers will be exceptionally difficult for me because of the heat and the humidity but at least it won't trigger my depression. With age Griffin is becoming more and more difficult to deal with and I am increasingly having a hard time caring for him in the manner in which he needs to be. Because of his meltdowns and doing the limp noodle and refusing to leave the apartment it is not just a source of frustration but a major obstacle in our daily routine. It seems as though I am trying to justify our leaving and this is not my intention because I feel like, in my heart and soul, this is truly the best decision for not just me but also for Griffin in the long and short term. Between my parents and I we can supplement his schooling with homework and hopefully with private OT and Speech. I don't know how good the medicaid system is down there but I am hoping that it will be comparable although I have heard that it is not even. It will be at least 2-3 months before we will be able to move so that I have plenty of time to get things organized and send items down there ahead of time. Also I am waiting for my disability hearing for Social Security and I don't know if it will be favorable or not but either way we are moving. Griffin will adjust quite easily and quickly I believe because he did so well when we went down there in April for a visit. I'm following my intuition on this and I have a good feeling about it.

9 comments:

Mamaroo said...

Intuition is a good thing to follow. I wish you all the best in this decision and I am sure it will be wonderful to have the support you need. I know that having my parents and my in-laws nearby has been such a huge support for us. Good luck, Lora!

Sam I Am said...

You have to go with your heart. You have to take care of you so you can take care of Griffin. I have never been diagnosed with SAD or depression, but as a person who does not struggle with those issues, I can tell you that our winters in Minnesota, and the many overcast days we see in the winter time, give me a greater appreciation and understanding of those like you who struggle with it (because I hate it). I have to have sunlight and my windows open. As a teacher, I have always hated newer school buildings, because they hardly have windows anymore. Natural lighting is so important to mental health. You will be in my thoughts dear friend as you plan your transition. Please, Please, Please investigate SCarolina health system and benefits first though. My sister struggled with depression half of her life, and trying to bring her across one state line to be with us was a nightmare. I just don't want you to lose what you deserve and need. Keep us posted!

Melissa H said...

I can only imagine how difficult it will be for you to uproot and move away from "home", even if it is to be with family. However, I think you're making a great decision for both of you. The more support that you have for Griffin, the better off you both will be, I think. My thoughts and prayers are always with you, but I will keep you even closer to my heart during these next few months.

K.C.'sMommy said...

You must follow your heart for Yourself and Griffin. The Winters have got to be extremely tough on you Lora and I can't imagine how it is. I know that you need to be near your family, it will be good to have family to visit and support as well. I know that there is an EXCELLENT TEACCH program in N.C. and I bet Griffin will do very well:) You are a terrific Mother and Griffin's Grandma is such a very nice lady Griffin will do super because he has such a great Mommy and Grandma:) We all support you here and care about you two very much, we are behind you 100%. That is one gorgeous young man in that photo! I love the black and white, he is beautiful!

((Hugs))

vidya ganesh said...

Good luck Lora!!! Everything is going to work out fine for you and Griffin. Our prayers are with you. :))Take care.

Wendy said...

Lora - If it feels right to you, it must be. Go with it. You are a wonderful mommy to Griffin and he learns more from you than from anyone. The summers are hot in SC but the winters aren't so bad. Are you moving close to the coast?

Melissa said...

Lora, as the other says, your intuition will guide you in the right direction. Good luck with everything!

kyra said...

oh, lora, i SO support you in this move. we mamas must take care of ourselves first and foremost for our own sake and, of course, for our children. i love that you'll be near family and can soak up more sunlight!

Sabrina said...

Dear Lora,
Good luck with the move. Familial support is so important, especially when we are having rough spouts. I know that everything may seem scary right now but just know that everything will fall into place in time. FIND STRENGTH....FEEL PEACE.
I read that in a card a while ago and bought it to put on my dresser. Find the strength you need, dig deep and you will get through everything. Good luck.