Single Moms Raising Autistic Sons

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Wednesday, January 06, 2010

My Letter to Griffin. Originally published December 2005, Griffin was 3 years old

My Dearest Griffin,

I remember the day that you were born, the joy that I felt was so overwhelming I thought that I would burst. Tears of joy streamed down my face and I knew at that moment that you would be the center of my universe for the rest of my life. You are my 'sonshine" and the love that I feel for you is so intense there are no words to describe it. It has been just you and me kiddo, and even though we don't have much we get by and perhaps we are much stronger for it. Griffin you have enriched my life more than anyone else. You have been a teacher to me that is, you and your autism have taught me about many things but mostly about myself. I have learned to be tenatious , strong, gentle, compassionate, patient, understanding, and a good listener. I feel that you have taught me far more than I could ever teach you. For this I must say that I am grateful.

There is nothing in my life more precious than your laughter. When I see you smile and hear you laugh there is no autism. All I see is a beautiful child filled with the quentessential perfection . You are as perfect as the day you were born, you are exactly as you were meant to be. No one can tell me that you have a problem, a disease, or that something is wrong with you. I see you, I understand you as Griffin with autism and if it happens to go away one day then it will be a day of celebration but if it doesn't then you are still my perfect child. You see my love, I have no expectations of you. You will progress at your own pace and I will be happy for every step that you take be it big or small. I don't know what the future holds nor do I want to plan it out as if I know what will happen. I want for us to take it one day at a time and cherish each moment in that day.

What I wish for you my sweet child is pure happiness . Since you are autistic then let us celebrate your differences, let us have pride in who you are, let us let the world know that autism or not you are Griffin and that you are an individual who deserves respect and recognition as a human being and a part of our society.
You may or may not be able to live alone or drive a car one day but you might be a writer or a mathmetician. There is one thing that I do wish for you to learn and that is to understand what danger is. If you could learn that Griffin your mommy would feel more at ease and more secure. Otherwise, I think that you are the most fantastic creature on the earth and that I have been blessed with you.

With All My Love Forever,

Your mommy


Taz said...

Oh Lora - that is just about the most beautiful thing I have ever read I feel exactly the same about Button. Thank you for sharing this with us x

Jen said...

Fabulous, says it all really:) Lucky Griffin. Jen

Clive said...

That is a really lovely letter, thank you for sharing.

Maddy said...

Cheering from the wings. Curiously, this afternoon when my ten and a half year old clambered on my lap for a cuddle, I couldn't helping thinking just how lucky I am that my boys have none of the usual inhibitions.

There again, if he doubles in size by the time he's twenty one I suspect I will be a bit squished!

mommy~dearest said...

Awww! That was beautiful.

Petunia said...

I love this post... It made me smile and teary at the same time. It says it all really and I wish I could articulate my feelings as beautifully as this. I sometimes catch my heart swell and almost burst with love when I look at Munchkin and realise that I accept her autism as it is part of who she is xx