Single Moms Raising Autistic Sons

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Sunday, March 05, 2006

My Letter to Griffin

My Dearest Griffin,

I remember the day that you were born, the joy that I felt was so overwhelming I thought that I would burst. Tears of joy streamed down my face and I knew at that moment that you would be the center of my universe for the rest of my life. You are my "Sonshine" and the love that I feel for you is so intense there are no words to describe it. It has been just you and me kiddo, and even though we don't have much we get by and perhaps we are much stronger for it. Griffin, you have enriched my life beyond compare. You have been a teacher to me that is, you and your autism have taught me about many things but mostly about myself. I have learned to be tenacious , strong, gentle, compassionate, patient, understanding, and a good listener. I feel that you have taught me far more than I could ever teach you. For this I must say that I am grateful. There is nothing in my life more precious than your laughter. When I see you smile and hear your laughter there is no autism. All I see is a beautiful child filled with the quintessential perfection . You are as perfect as the day you were born, you are exactly as you were meant to be. No one can tell me that you have a problem, a disease, or that something is wrong with you. I see you, I understand you as Griffin with autism and if it happens to go away one day then it will be a day of celebration but if it doesn't then you are still my perfect child. You see my love, I have no expectations of you. You will progress at your own pace and I will be happy for every step that you take be it big or small. I don't know what the future holds nor do I want to plan it out as if I know what will happen. I want for us to take it one day at a time and cherish each moment in that day. What I wish for you my sweet child is pure happiness . Since you are autistic then let us celebrate your differences, let us have pride in who you are, let us let the world know that autism or not you are Griffin and that you are an individual who deserves respect and recognition as a human being and a part of our society. You may or may not be able to live alone or drive a car one day but you might be a writer or a mathematician. No matter what you end up doing you will be successful in doing it, I know. There is one thing that I do wish for you to learn and that is to understand what danger is. If you could learn that Griffin your mommy would feel more at ease and more secure. Otherwise, I think that you are the most fantastic creature on the earth and that I have been blessed with you.

With All My Love Forever,

Your mommy


smiffykins said...

i have just come acreoss ur blog. thank u. i have borderline personality disorder and they are still (7yrs on)debating on bipolar. i work with severly autistic teenagers in england. it is great to hear how u manage asd and bipolar. it gives me hope that when i get round to having kids of my own i might cope.

Debby said...

This has to be the most beautiful piece I have ever had the pleasure to read. Your love for Griffin just flows from my monitor. He is truly a blessed child.

ann hawkins said...

remember i told you when you were given this miracle you should be ready to have your heart walking outside your body for the rest of your life, well this is the most beautiful way you could have explained what your heart is overflowing with your love for griffin. you know this makes you both equally special he gives you the special and you give him the most needed love. love you both mom

Melissa H said...

What a beautiful letter, Lora. You made my heart soar with the overflowing love for my own "sonshine".

KCsMom said...

How beautiful, ((sigh)) I have to admit when I started reading I had my own good tears. I had to go hug both my boys right away! You are a great Mommy Lora, it shows in all your posts:) I love reading your blog Lora and look forward to reading more about your special little guy and you too Lora! Takes a very special Mommy to have such a terrific kiddo as Griffin is:)

kyra said...

such beautiful and powerful words of love. griffin will treasure that letter, as well as the MANY moments he has with his dear mommy!

thanks for your comment on my blog. i will see you in a couple of weeks after some yummy time in the sun!

Peggy Lou Morgan said...

I can't top beautiful. It is really very special.

Melissa said...

Wow Lora! That is a beautiful letter. It brought tears to my eyes. :) Griffin is so lucky to have such a loving mom.