Monday, December 05, 2005
My Gift Has a Message
As I watched my sweet angel sleep I wondered about many things in the peaceful stillness of the night. I wondered if I was doing everything "right" for him , was he as happy as he seemed to be, did he know how much I loved him ?
Then there's the future that I wondered about........when will he be potty trained, will he ever learn to understand danger, will he ever be independent, would he even miss me if something ever happened to me, will he ever fall in love, will he have children , will he ever live alone and drive a car? My mind just kept going over and over all these questions until finally it occured to me........I was making a major mistake, one that could not be undone.
I was wasting that beautiful and precious moment on worrying about questions that I had no answers for. I was immersed in the past/future and completely forgot about the present. Here is my beautiful child Griffin lying there as if he were a gift , one who was sent to me to convey a message , "Live in the moment, Lora! Don't waste it on worries just look at your child and love everything about him." I knew that I would never get this time ever again, that it could pass and I wouldn't have appreciated it. I snuggled up next to him, gently kissed his cheek and told him how much I loved him. I just let the worries disappear,I listened to his heartbeat and felt the warmth of his breath on my skin as I drifted off to sleep.
What special moment do you remember?